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Staying Sober During the Holidays: Protecting Your Sanity and Your Sobriety

by Friendly House on

 With the holiday season in full swing, it’s often portrayed as a time when everyone is happy, joyous, and free—or at least expected to be. If you’re someone who feels more depressed, stressed, or anxious during the holidays, you’re far from alone. For many people, the holidays bring added pressure, complicated family dynamics, and financial strain. 

Maybe your eccentric Aunt Dolores is staying for a week and walks around in just a robe. Maybe your parents or in-laws have strong opinions about your inflatable yard ornaments. And if interpersonal stressors aren’t enough, the financial expectations of the season can pile on quickly. 

Why the Holidays Can Be Especially Challenging in Sobriety 

For sober individuals, these added stressors can come with powerful triggers. Those triggers might look like urges to use substances, overeat, overspend, or engage in other coping behaviors. One of the most common—and dangerous—triggers is the belief that substances are necessary to relax, have fun, or truly enjoy the holidays. 

These triggers can be especially prevalent in early sobriety, but they don’t discriminate. Without a plan in place, holiday triggers can lead to relapse whether you have five days or fifty years of sobriety.  

The good news? You’re not powerless. There are practical steps you can take to protect both your sobriety and your peace of mind during the holiday season. 

Practical Tips for Navigating the Holidays Sober 

  • Stay connected. 
    Call your sponsor or mentor daily. Consistent connection can make all the difference. In addition, make one or more outreach calls each day—the more, the merrier—to friends who are sober or supportive of your sobriety. 
  • Prioritize meetings. 
    Before the holidays arrive, identify one or two meetings you plan to attend each day and commit to them. Be sure to find out where marathon meetings are being held on the holiday itself and keep that information handy. 
  • Create your own traditions. 
    If you’re unable to visit family, consider reaching out to other sober individuals in the same position. Hosting or attending a sober holiday gathering can provide connection without the pressure. 
  • Have a plan for alcohol-centered events. 
    If you find yourself at an event where alcohol is being served, keep a non-alcoholic beverage in your hand as much as possible. This often discourages people from offering you a drink—especially those who don’t know you’re sober. 
  • Take breaks when needed. 
    When things start to feel overwhelming, step away. Go outside, take a few deep breaths, and give your higher power a quick shout-out by naming a few things you’re grateful for. Then, return to the festivities grounded and centered. 
  • Stay vigilant. 
    Finally, if you’re handed a beverage or there’s any chance your cup may have been mixed up with someone else’s, always give it a quick smell before taking a sip. It’s a simple habit that can prevent a serious situation. 
  • Just say no 

And most importantly, if you have doubts about attending any events you are not obligated to attend. If you do go and find you’re overwhelmed or triggered, you can leave. Protecting our sobriety is the most important.  

You Don’t Have to Do This Alone 

The holidays can be challenging, but they don’t have to derail your recovery. With preparation, connection, and self-compassion, you can move through the season with your sobriety—and your sanity—intact. 

If the holidays feel heavy this year, remember: you’re not failing, you’re human. Reach out, stay connected, and take it one day at a time.